That's low

In 2008, while in the middle of my hematology clinical rotation, I heard an interesting announcement on the radio.  Georgia wants to move the border with Tennessee north in order to access the Tennessee River to provide water for the Atlanta area.

Right.  That’s gonna fly.

Personally, I did not exactly enjoy my time in Chattanooga.  The hospital part was cool, but all I could afford was to crash on the floor of a house in a sketchy part of town with a bunch of college students that smoked enough weed that I’m probably lucky I never got pee-tested.  That said, it’s still part of Tennessee.  It’s still family, it’s just the uncle no one ever talks about.

Fast forward to this week.  I saw a front page article in a Georgia business paper that said Georgia’s Attorney General has threatened to sue Tennessee in the Supreme Court if they don’t sit down by April 2014.

Come on.  You’re bringing lawyers into it now?  Weak, Georgia, weak.

Yeah, we’re gonna sue you!

The story from the south side is that this feud has been running for 195+ years.  Which is, of course, why no one on the north side had ever heard of it until five years ago.

The GA AG claims the real reason they've got their panties in a wad is that Tennessee has not been taking them seriously.

Manbearpig is real!

The really disturbing part, though, is that they’re saying Tennessee refuses to negotiate.  Well, what precisely is Georgia giving up?  In the words of a late president, “We cannot negotiate with those who say, ‘What’s mine is mine, and what’s yours is negotiable.’”

Here’s a novel idea:  try buying the land you need.

Tennessee is a pretty capitalist state.  In order to access the Tennessee River, Georgia only needs a 1.5 mile section on border moved.  How about ponying up a few million or so?

And that’s another thing.  The river has Tennessee’s flippin’ name on it.  Where does anyone get off claiming it’s part of Georgia?

They may have missed their chance, though.  In 2011, Tennessee posted its first budget surplus in years.  $19.9 million.  This year, the projected surplus is $540 million.  Still, stretched out over the next 5 to 10 years, coughing up a billion would probably work.

Still, most of the water they want is for Atlanta.  Ballpark population:  7 million.  You charge all of them $10 a month for a year and you've got $840 million.

Just a thought.

But if there's another plan, and they intend to go all "Peach Dawn" on us, I have one world for them:

WOLVERINES!!!