Confession time:  I just now got around to watching Scream.  For a horror buff, that's pathetic.  However, it got me to thinking about the possibility of my daughters babysitting some day.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Me:  "Okay, The Dot, big day.  Your first baby-sitting gig.  You ready?"

The Dot:  "Yes, Daddy."

Me:  "You sure?  You have everything?"

The Dot:  "Yes, Daddy."

Me:  "Cell phone?"

The Dot:  "Check."

Me:  "First aid kit?"

The Dot:  "Check."

Me:  "AED?"

The Dot:  "Check."

Me:  "Fire extinguisher?

The Dot:  "Check."

Me:  "Shotgun?"

The Dot:  "Check."

Me:  "Slugs and buck?"

The Dot:  "Check."

Me:  "Silver crucifix?"

The Dot:  "Check."

Me:  "Ash stakes?"

The Dot:  "Ash stakes, mirror, Molatovs, chainsaw, and Kevlar.  Check, check, check, check, and check."

Me:  "Trauma plates in that vest?"

The Dot:  "Daaaddddyyyyy."

Me:  "Okay, now remember what we went over."

The Dot (rolling eyes and sighing):  "No drinking, no boyfriend, zombie in the brain, vampire in the heart."

Me:  "And?"

The Dot:  "And if the slasher goes down, press the attack."

Me:  "And no matter what shows up?"

The Dot:  "Perforate, decapitate, and incinerate."

Me (kissing her forehead): "Good girl.  Have fun!"